MARYAM MAHFOOZ: A FATHER FONDLY REMEMBERS
For the last months since her second death anniversary on the October 16 ,2000, I have been wondering whether to write to you because it seems odd for a man who is 56 and who is in the twilight of his life to write to a teenage magazine and that, too, after a lapse of two years. But the words of the Editor of this Magazine, when she learnt about her death, were, indeed, very moving and come to my mind again and again. Indeed, they were the finest tributes and which acted as a balm for me and my family, Maryam’s mother and father and for her brothers and sisters. Now after two days Eid is due and her memories are coming flooding back
She was our favourite, not only for me but also for the entire family. Everyone who knew her, uncles, aunts, neighbours and friends of the family loved her. Her uncle Naeem had made a point to donate blood to her every now and then because she was suffering from Thalassemmia Major, a fatal disease of the blood. But later on, more complications developed which led to her death. Not only did he donate blood but he left special instructions with his wife, a very noble soul herself, and his sons to donate their (sons) blood, whenever needed. Shortly before her death, Naeem’s older brother, a PIA pilot, had arrived then from New York and was visiting his under construction house and when he learnt that Maryam had been hospitalized in the Children’s Hospital in Islamabad in a very serious condition, he, at once, rushed to donate blood to her. He sat with Maryam for two hours till I finished office, amusing her by telling hilarious anecdotes and stories. Indeed, this cousin of mine is a great friend of the children. But for Maryam, he had a special liking and this liking was mutual. Once her doctor, Naila Yaqub, advised me to acquire a sportsmen helmet for her to be worn at all times as a precaution against hurting herself on the head because after her brain surgery, she developed epilepsy and her fits were so bad that she often fell down and hurt herself. Because of these fits, she stopped going to school two years before her death. I mentioned to Captain Zabih, her uncle. On the third day, Zabih brought a helmet for her. Such was great love, which the uncle and niece shared.
She was a patient child. Whenever we or anyone else enquired about her condition from her, her only reply was that she was fine and invariably thanked the enquirer even though she was in pain. Mrs. Nighat Nasar, the wife of the M.D. Caltex, great family friends, often came to see her whenever she was hospitalized and invariably asked Maryam what she wanted. But the only answer Mrs. Nasar got “No, Aunty, thank you. I don’t need anything”
She was a very loving child. She used to remember the birthdays of her parents and her friends. Even towards the end of her life when her going had become restricted, she would ask her family to bring birthday cards, get well cards as the case may be. A couple of months before her death, she asked me one evening to accompany me to the market. But, all the while, she kept the reason of her going out to herself. We went to a ready-made garments shop and bought a shirt for me despite my great dissuasion.
She had a premonition of her death. She told her friend that the latter promised to come and see her but the friend would come only when she was gone. She also confided in her friend that her late grandfather i.e. my father, came to fetch her to a land of happiness where they would play. Her friend told us the day Maryam died.
Maryam was my father’s favourite although he loved my five children alike. But she occupied a very special place in his affection. Both of them had many common traits. Both of them were born within two days of each other, of course, in different years, or rather eras. And both are buried within yards of each other.
But we as Muslims have faith in the Almighty Allah and in His Graciousness, His Mercy and in His Benevolence.
Mahfooz-ur-Rahman
Father of the late Maryam Mahfooz
House no. 409-B, Satellite Town,
Rawalpindi.
Mahfoozur_rahman@hotmail.com
.
P.S.
The finest tribute to Maryam was paid by dear friend ,Maria Ramzan Akhtar , when she named her new born daughter Maryam .
Dear Editor,
Enclosed please find a copy of an article entitled ‘This is what I go through’ by Maryam Mahfooz which was published in your magazine a couple of years back.
I am writing this letter to inform you, and through you your readers of your magazine, that my daughter, Maryam Mahfooz, died on 16th October, 1998 at 12.30 a.m. from various complications like brain hemorrhage, pneumonia and meningitis.
For the last seven years she had been calmly battling against her illnesses. She had been in and out of the hospital.
When her article appeared in your magazine many of your readers wrote to her and she found a great many friends, particularly Miss Maria Ramzan Akhter, who became her very fast friend. It was Maria who made my daughter very happy and who came to Maryam’s last rites. May Allah Bless Maria.
I also take this opportunity to thank her various doctors particularly Dr. Naila Yaqoob, Dr. Ghazala Sultan, Dr. Jai Krishan who went out of the way to attend to her. May God Bless all of them.
With regards,
Yours truly,
Mahfooz urRahman
Dear Mr. Mehfooz,
If there were words to express the sorrow that I felt upon reading your missive I would write it down but the fact is that it’s so deep and so troubling, for me at least, that I am unable to register the fact truly. Maryam was one of our very arduous readers and wrote very well. To lose so much to God seems so upsetting and yet, we cannot deny God of taking one of his very beloved and keeping her safe with Him. I am sure that I will be voicing our readers’ thoughts when I say that I wish you courage and fortitude to go on in life even with the loss of your daughter and in time, bless you with hope and happiness for surely this sweet, loving and pristine Maryam, like her namesake, is chosen to be cherished forever. – Editor.
M
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